Breath of Life Testimony: Cynthia

I am so very grateful to my mentor, Julie Lewis. Thank you, Julie, my friend, from the bottom of my heart. I began smoking at age 20 while in college. My friends smoked; it was cool and socially accepted at the time. I became addicted for 28 yrs., smoking 20-30 cigarettes a day. I tried five times to quit over the past few years before finding Setting Captives Free. Habitual smoking and dependence on nicotine is idolatry and kept me separated from God. For years, I also drank alcohol excessively. God delivered me of that addiction, but I continued smoking. I attended church with my daughter, but stayed in the darkness. I never really had a relationship with God, although I thought I did. But I was critical of services, the music, whatever, and slipped out early all the time to go and smoke. I never got close to people at church, because I was hiding my sin. I never hugged anyone because they would smell the smoke. I was such a hypocrite, and I had no peace. God got my attention when my mother-in-law was diagnosed with COPD and then lung cancer. I bought nicotine patches and quit smoking for seven weeks. I knew in my heart that I would end up just like my mother-in-law, if I did not quit smoking. But I relapsed and, over the next few weeks, I smoked off and on, keeping myself in constant withdrawal. I was a nicotine junkie; I thought I would never be free of the bondage of smoking. I quit again, and, on the third day, I was in agony, crying out to God and in despair, I was led by the Lord to Setting Captives Free. To quit smoking for the glory of God had never occured to me. It was such a simple and life-changing concept. Then God showed me the face of death up close and personal. My mother-in-law regained consciousness briefly and found herself attached to a ventilator. She looked into my eyes and I will never forget it. I was at her bedside when she died. Afterward, I stopped smoking for a few days and then became a closet smoker. Now that is a distressing way to live. My husband smoked occasionally while drinking a beer, although he mainly used snuff. I would sneak out to his workshop and steal his smokes, all the time while trying to work through this course. The Holy Spirit was convicting me of this behavior, but still I gratified my evil flesh, smoking and hiding. I even picked up butts off the ground and smoked them, too. When I confessed this to my mentor, she got tough with me, which is what I needed. She wanted me to start the Breath of Life course over and I agreed. What could I say; I was STILL smoking!! At that point, I totally surrendered my life to God, gave the addiction to Him, trusted and began obeying the Spirit. Everything turned around in my life. I turned to Jesus and feasted on Him, drinking of His living water, rather than depending on smoking for my emotional needs. God also delivered my husband of smoking, and he quit, too. God himself took away my access to cigarettes; I truly believe that. This course strengthened me, encouraged me and reminded me to focus on Jesus while battling the demon of addiction. I have not touched a cigarette in two months, and could never have done this without God. It was for His glory alone, and, by His grace, I will NEVER go back to my old life. The Spirit has returned to me fuller than ever before, and I am now bearing the fruit I used to covet in others. I hug everybody at church and am involved in everything my church does. I stopped isolating myself, and am happier and more fully alive than I have ever been before. My mentor, Julie, has been used by God for my benefit and deliverance. She always knows how to help me. I thank God for placing her in my life. I thank God for setting me free from the slavery of smoking.