Door of Hope Testimony: Ken

Ken's Testimony:
My mentor is Bob.
I am a man,who, for nearly 30 years, has been living in bondage to homosexuality; pornography and self gratification. Ironically,I am also a skilled professional,well educated; loving father and husband that is considered to be a kind, thoughtful,moral and honest Christian!
I grew up with great self doubt. I never connected with other boys or established lasting male friendships. I did not have a close bond with my father or brothers. Because discussions in our family, regarding physical development and intimacy were taboo, I found answers to my questions in inappropiate ways. Consequently, I associated a beautiful and pure gift with lurid, secretive, desire. Curiosity into homosexuality became my path of searching for the intmacy I had longed to have with men.
I entered college early and found an intoxicating world of acceptance in the homosexual culture. I soon realized I did not want to make that my lifestyle. A year later, I married a loving girl who knew about my past and accepted me.
I lived the next years in a double existance. I was a good worker and student; good father; active in church ... while living in the darkness of lustful gratification of the flesh at the same time. My life spiraled, slowly, out of control. I took greater and greater risks. The guilt and shame I tried to keep hidden. The effects grew more obvious, as I distanced myself from my relationship with God and my Wife. I allowed my wife to feel crazy,as I sank deeper into the wickedness of deceit.
I had created a life void of hope.
I had an inappropriate email relationship with a guy who asked me if I had heard of "Setting Captives Free". He had chosen to rebuke his sin and entered the Door of Hope course. He asked me to consider doing the same. I knew I needed help, so I decided to try it.
I had reached total devastation.
I have repented with a broken spirit. I have sought God's healing power and love. I honor and glorify the name of Jesus Christ who took the sins I had committed and bore them to give me Life. God is transforming my life as I have become free from the chains of my sexual impurity. My wife sees a new husband with whom she is willing to live in restored newness of faith as we rebuild our lives together. This has been devastating for her, but she is transforming and healing more each day.
I opened the Door of Hope and Jesus reached for me and carried my broken soul into His Light! I praise his Holy Name daily as I continue my walk in Him. I still face temptations, but I am bearing the armour of the Lord as I walk daily in His Light.