Door of Hope Testimony:

My mentor played a huge part in my healing from my homosexual addictions. Had it not been for his prayers and non-judgmental support I don't know if I would have made it. Early in the course I was going through terrible withdrawals and was experiencing intense spiritual attacks. He let me vent on him in my times of frustration and he rejoiced with me in each new victory. I now have a new friend and brother. I thank my Father in Heaven for bringing him into my life.

I had it kind of rough growing up. My mother was abusive in just about every way. My siblings and I were subjected to name-calling and uncontrolled spankings, which often left bruises. It wasn't uncommon for us to hear how much she hated us. My dad was too busy with his career to be bothered with his children so I didn't have a very good relationship with him either. Growing up, not once did I hear the words "I love you" nor was I ever hugged or touched in a kind way.

I was about 7 years old when I was enticed into having sex with another boy. From that moment on I was hooked on homosexual behavior and actively pursued it. In high school I discovered pornography. That discovery fueled the fire of my homosexual addiction. I continued to have sex with other guys until just after high school when I decided that I wanted a family. So I started dating a girl whom I eventually married.

Throughout our marriage I had intermittent periods of indiscretion when I would visit the porn shops or rent porn but fortunately I didn't succumb to the desire to have gay sex. It wasn't until my wife left me after 16 years of marriage that gay porn and masturbation began to really control my life.

With the advent of the Internet I no longer had to go out and risk being seen renting porn. So I spent hours and hours in front of the computer masturbating and I couldn't stop. I swore many times to quit only to find myself back in front of the computer often times only an hour or two after vowing not do it again. I was hopelessly hooked and I honestly felt that I was stuck with my homosexual desires. I could feel myself slowly turning into a beast.

Sixty-six days ago God brought an event into my life that caused me to examine the wreck I had become. That's when I was led to Setting Captives Free. I signed up for the Door of Hope course and set out on the journey of a lifetime. Through the course God has brought true healing into my life. I finally feel like I am no longer a scared and insecure little boy but rather a man - a man of God who loves Jesus.

The course lessons weren't always easy and I have to admit that I was a bit reluctant to let go of some of my old life but I found that when I did Jesus moved into my heart and set me free from my addiction to homosexual porn and masturbation. The three lessons on God's grace brought me to my knees several times. I now know what it is to experience grace, love and mercy. I can never go back to my evil way of living. I am happy and content in my relationship with my Father in Heaven through his Son Jesus and I give him all the glory for the changes he's made in my life.