Lord's Table Testimony: Alyssa

I felt like I had no hope to overcome what overcame me when I was around food, especially the tasty food - you know, the salty, sweet, and/or spicy tastes that the mouth starts watering for when one's eyes rest on food. Rest, yes, that's the word. That evading thing I feel like I should have because I know Jesus, the Comforte. But I don't have it, no matter what I do. Something is always seeming to eat away at my soul with the same intensity I have as I scarf down that fourth piece of pizza. It's never enough.
od found me when I had no strength left. I weighed more than I ever did in my lifetime. I knew others had noticed it, too, but couldn't stand the thought of what it would take to lose the weight. I was embarrassed of how big I had gotten (compared to my former weight) since going to college, and I knew it wasn't good for me, others, od's reputation in my life. I didn't even feel like I could pray because I had done that far too often with such disappointing results. But I knew somehow, some way, od could help me, so I looked online for whatever verses I could find on the subject of eating. All I found was that gluttony was a sin. As I stumbled through the online Bible verses at Biblegateway.com, I found this website and course that showed at least some promise and would be worth looking through given my current situation. It all seemed to be what I was looking for, so I went ahead and enrolled. And wow, was it heavy stuff. Here they were challenging me to be totally against the sin in my life and to strive to bring glory to od, no matter what. In fact, if I wasn't going to be giving glory to od through the course, I was supposed to quit. I had two desires that conflicted: my desire to look better in others' eyes and a desire to give od the ultimate glory. So I continued with the course, and found that satisfaction in od and satisfaction in food are two inseparable things. If I am going to be satisfied after my meal, or after any activity, I need to be satisfied in the Lord. Now, it's not as easy as it sounds. But it is completely and absolutely true. od's glory is my good, and it is delightful. I have now lost over 10 lbs and am under my original goal weight. My mentor is awesome and prays/writes to me whenever she can. Without her support and encouragement, I may have quit a long time before this. I feel as if I am nearly healed of this mark on my soul, the mark of dissatisfaction and dissappointment. It is a daily process, though, and not that I never stumble... oh, do I stumble. But I will never forget this freedom that Christ has given me... the strength that He supplies. He will always be my Everything, and praise Him for using this course to help establish me in Him.