New Wine Testimony: Sonya

My name is Sonya. I have been working on the New Wine course at Setting Captives Free for the last 59 days and Donna is my mentor. For 17 years I lived in bondage to drugs and alcohol. I was oblivious to the fact I was heading down a path of destruction and ruin. I was living in hopeless despair and I placed all my trust in cocaine as well as many other mind-altering drugs. I remember trying to convince myself that I was in control of the drugs rather than being controlled, but the countless poor choices I made proved otherwise. I pushed away loved ones, walked away from a rewarding career and overdosed on more than one occasion. I was sexually and physically abused from the age of four until age 17. I cursed God and I thought even if He did exist I wanted no part of Him in my life. How could a loving God allow an innocent child to be repeatedly tortured, and not intervene? This question was an ever-playing record in my mind. I had no self-worth and gradually drugs became my comfort blanket, my way of escape. They numbed my pain and kept everything suppressed for a season. This began my life of drug abuse. I had a cut-throat, selfish personality, and sin was rampant in my life. I was lured into any form of darkness that was made available to me. But God... little did I know that God had better and bigger plans for my life. In spite of my unworthiness, God rescued me from the pit of hell that I had been living in for so long. In August of 2003, I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior and He gave me a sense of peace and security that I had never known. Jesus saved me, not because I deserved it but because of His grace and mercy. After salvation, something changed on the inside of me and I slowly began to trust God and trust was an emotion that was foreign to me. After all those years of denouncing God, He still loved me and embraced me. Today I know that Jesus is my advocate and my vindicator and in Him I will place my trust. One assurance that scripture gives us is we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us and, throughout the New Wine course at Setting Captives Free, I have witnessed this over and over again. I know that I don't have to live in bondage to drugs any longer. God wants me to walk in freedom and the last 59 days have certainly been invaluable to me. My mentor, Donna, has supported me wholeheartedly and it's comforting to know that God used others that share in some of my same struggles to help me. What a privilege to know that God uses unlikely vessels and unlikely situations for good. I have learned the protection that comes with accountability and I now know that I don't have to be an overcomer on my own. God placed me in the midst of good counsel and I am determined to walk in freedom from my drug addiction and I am devoted to helping others gain victory, too. I pray my testimony will be used to encourage others. God bless you.