Way of Purity Testimony: Alvin

My mentor's name is Ken.

I was in the bondage of sexual sin. I lived my life in darkness with many secrets. I hid my sins from everyone, even those closest to me. The devil had me convinced that there was nothing wrong with what I was doing, "it's something every guy does." I was also convinced that I was hurting no one, and that eventually I would be satisfied and could stop anytime I wanted. I searched for sexual images to quench my thirst, but they never did, and eventually that search led me to adultery. I was living a horrible, selfish, and disgusting double life. I tried to hide from God and felt like a hypocrite at church. My sins cause me to built a wall between God and my heart, and also between me and my wife. That wall started to crack and eventually came crashing down on top of me. In a matter of days the sins I had been keeping in the dark for so long were forced into the light. I was beat down and broken. God wanted me at my lowest point before He could help me. He knew I needed a huge wake up call and not just a small reminder. I came within inches of losing everything that was dear to me. All my pride was taken away, and I knew I was at the mercy of God. I screwed up my life trying to live it my way. Now it was time for God to take over. I found the help I was looking for in the bible, in the Setting captives free bible study, and in others. I searched for every path I could find that led to a better life. Now I see and feel God working in my life and heart. I was no longer afraid to go to church, in fact it felt like every lesson there seemed to apply to my current situation. At the very time I needed God's grace, and needed to know that He loved me, those words were spoken at church. My heart and mind are now open to God and His Word. I want to learn all that I can so that I will know how to live a life God can be proud of. I enjoy not being a slave to sexual sin anymore. I know there will always be obstacles the devil provides to try and trip me up, but living in the Spirit will defiantly help me avoid those obstacles. I feel a huge weight has come off my soul now, and I can start to reconstruct my life and marriage.