Way of Purity Testimony: Stephanie

I grew up in a Christian family and became a Christian at a young age. When I was 15 or 16 years old, I read some books that I shouldn't have and learned about self-gratification. My struggles with self-gratification and lustful thoughts continued for about ten years until a few months ago. During my struggle, I knew that what I was doing was wrong and I wanted to stop, but I couldn't. I would ask God to forgive me each time I fell, but a few days, weeks, or months later, I would fall into sin again. From the outside, I seemed to have everything together, but on the inside, I was struggling. I knew that I should confess my sins to a friend and have someone hold me accountable, but I couldn't get past my pride and I also felt a deep sense of shame because stereotypically, women aren't supposed to struggle with these kinds of things and I did. For a long time, I felt like God was calling me to take care of this issue, but I ignored his voice. Finally, I was so tired of being stuck in sin and enrolled in The Way of Purity. I had heard about this website from a friend and decided to give it a try. I remember reading the testimonies and having hope that lasting freedom from my sins was truly possible. From the daily studies, I realized how much of my day was spent dwelling on sexual thoughts. I realized how I had turned to lustful thoughts and self-gratification to try to fill the desires of my heart that only God can fill. I realized how passive I was in trying to battle my sins. I confessed my sins to God and to a friend. My friend was very gracious and encouraging when I told her about my sins and it was so good to finally be open with someone about the struggles that I had kept hidden for so long. Through the studies and most of all, by God's grace, I learned how to be vigilant and take immediate action against the first thought or appearance of temptation. The studies really emphasize spending time each day reading the Bible and doing other things that connect you to God. I realized how, even though in the past, I would spend time each day reading my Bible and praying, I wasn't allowing God's truth to pierce and change my heart. This journey to freedom hasn't been easy, but it has been worth every bit of struggle. The freedom and life that God has to offer far exceed any momentary pleasure from sexual sins! Much thanks to my mentor, Gail, for her encouragement throughout this journey and all praise and glory to God for setting me free!