Way of Purity Testimony: Ricky

Richard Degarmo is my mentor. I came to Setting Captives Free because I knew I was walking the road to destruction. I have been in the ministry for years, and have encouraged dozens of students to go through The Way of Purity course, but I had never done it myself. Over the past year, I began to experience a greatly increased amount of stress and depression in my career. I dealt with this stress by retreating into myself and playing Internet games for hours. I soon found out that many people sex-chat during those games, and I started taking part in that, as well. I quickly became addicted to this fantasy world where I could conquer women. The fear that being caught meant losing my job and shaming my family, only added the fuel of adrenaline to the fire. I tried to stop many times, but could not quit. I could see my job and family beginning to unravel. I walked around angry all the time, and withdrew from my wife. Somehow, I was blaming her for my sin. I started The Way of Purity course out of the conviction that if I did not stop my sin, I would be another disgraced minister without a job or family. But, I still had my pride (I didnt think I was as bad as the porn addicts), and I honestly did not want to give up my sin. It had become such a comfort to me that I did not want to face life without it. God steadily broke me and lead me to repentance, including hours of fasting and weeping over the weakness I experienced in the face of my sin. God gave me repentance and great joy in victory over my sin. Though I have fallen twice since beginning the course, God has shown me that sex-chatting is no true comfort, but only a filthy stream that leaves me dehydrated and thirstier than ever. His grace is the true thirst-quenching stream that has made me a better husband, father and minister. He has also produced the fruit of the Spirit in my life. For years, I have been praying for gentleness, kindness and self-control, now I am seeing these for the first time. Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, I am free at last.