A United Front
Letters from Spouses
Encouragement
Sounds like you and Tom have been on a down turn. I am sorry for the struggle. It can be tiresome, I know; but remember how we are warned that it will be this way. Scripture tells us to not become weary in doing what is right for we will reap a great harvest if we do not faint. Don't faint, Maria!
One trend I am seeing with you guys is that as long as you and Tom remain vigilant in your fight against porn, etc then things go well; but whenever you let your guard down then wham....down you go. Truthfully, everyone is like this to some degree especially when first coming out of sin. Mike and I still remain on guard at all times even though Mike has been free for over two years!
How are things coming with finding a godly group of people to fellowship and worship with where you live? I believe, that face-to-face accountability is so necessary. One thing that helped me to make it through the hard times was that I had the encouragement and support of my local church and I was exposed to good Biblical teaching every week. Further, the local body was important for Mike because he was challenged to change and grow in his walk with the Lord and required to be accountable to other godly men not just to me--which was great because it took the pressure off of me somewhat.
Tom is no more impossible than any other man I have ever heard of or met. They are ALL sinners. They all have failings...every one of them. We women do too, of course. The things that must be done are: 1. Radical amputation: Maria, you have to disable the computer if you are not going to be home. I don't care what you do to it, but you have to do all that you can to make your home a safe haven for Sam especially when you cannot be there to help him. If there are any other things that need to be done too then you and Tom need to brainstorm and figure out how to radically amputate anything that stimulates Sam sexually other than you to the degree that you are able. 2. Radical Accountability--as mentioned above and 3. Radical application of God's Word to your lives--you both need to be interacting with the Word daily and doing it.
Don't despair, Maria, God knows and He does see. He cares for you and He is working it all out for your good and His glory. You might not be able to see it right now; but in times like these we can cling to the character of God. He is good (ALL the time) and we can trust Him.
I love you and I am praying for you.
Jody
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